Our expectations are linear.
We crave instantly dramatic improvement.
Real life is far curvier, with both plot twists and lots of lulls.
This graph from James Clear’s Atomic Habits illustrates this perfectly.
The Valley of Disappointment is that period when you’re “doing everything right”... but the results aren’t showing.
You’re eating well and exercising … but your body looks the same.
You’re aggressively promoting your business or your new project … but you’re not getting any traction.
You’re making wise money decisions…but your bank balances look mostly the same.
Or you’ve decided to learn piano or guitar (or French or Italian), and after a few lessons, you feel less musical, less linguistically talented than when you started.
Sadly, The Valley of Disappointment is the biggest reason we don’t stick with things.I often forget this myself, even though I explain this exact concept each and every every Sunday, when I teach restorative yoga.
In a restorative class students are directed into long-hold shapes with props.
The experience is designed to be relaxing and comfortable.
And yet, almost every week, someone will wave me over to whisper:
“This feels nice…but…it doesn’t feel like anything is happening.”
I remind them that they’re going to be in the shape for 5-10 minutes.
The effective is cumulative.
The change WILL happen.
And, after an hour of this work, if I’ve done my job setting things up properly, the formerly-questioning student is now more or less a serene puddle.
* * *
We’re four weeks into 2020, and I encourage you not to give up, even if it feels at times like you’re living in The Valley of Disappointment.
(I’ve felt that temptation several times myself this month.)
That’s when we all need to remember what Fannie Flagg once said:
Don’t Give Up Before the Miracle Happens!
