Free Passion to Prosperity Event Saturday 3/20 HERE
Belle was a supremely well-behaved dog, one I could take anywhere.
There were countless times she sat quietly at my feet––whether that was during an extended boisterous birthday dinner or a tedious wait while opening up a new bank account.
After an hour or more had passed, as we got up to exit, the bank officer or the waitress or even just my dinner companions would remark:
Wow…I completely forgot she was there.
In fact, the only disobedient moment I can recall with her was over a decade ago.
It was during a gallery show of my artwork on the Lower East Side.
Making Visual art is very much a side passion of mine.
I’ve had several gallery shows on both coasts and a few magazine profiles for my past work.
Anyway, the gallery was a seven-minute walk from our Chinatown loft and Belle often visited during the installation period.
And, to be totally honest, I may actually have gotten the show in the first place because of her.
Months before on a casual Saturday afternoon art walk, after we popped our heads into her gallery, the curator fell in love with Belle.
Giving me a show was probably just a way for them to spend more quality time together.
In any case…
On the night of the opening event, since I was swamped with last-minute tasks, I asked a friend to walk Belle, bring her by the party for a moment, then take her back to our home.
(There was some kind of dinner celebration afterward and I didn’t want to leave her unattended for that long.)
The opening reception was packed and naturally Belle made a huge hit when she arrived.
And then…she refused to leave.
She was, in fact, utterly incredulous at the mere suggestion that she should exit a party in full swing.
My perfectly obedient dog simply dug in her heels.
“All of my friends are here,” she telegraphed. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Her logic was, of course, impeccable, and yet since I couldn’t bring her to the restaurant reception, something had to be done.
Ultimately, I had to “fake exit” with her, walking her halfway home so that my friend could complete the journey.
She complied but she still wasn’t happy.
In fact, this was pretty much the look she gave me as she accepted our temporary––though nonetheless “tragic”––separation from each other and from the party.
Belle’s persistence paid off.
Within a year, Belle was certified with the Humane Society and began making the rounds at old folks homes as a therapy dog.
A fortunate side effect of this was that armed with her service dog papers and uniform, never again would she be denied access to an art gallery reception at a hipster restaurant.
In other words, that was the last party she ever missed.
In my own life, I’ve also experienced the power of not taking “No” for an answer––or at least not as the final verdict.
Shortly after college, I applied to the graduate program in screenwriting at U.S.C.
Unfortunately, plagued by (mostly) their bureaucratic screwups, my arrangement with the bursar’s office was fraught with uncertainty.
I had no idea how I was going to pay for the graduate program, in other words.
I arrived on campus, in what I assume is the attitude paratroopers embody as they land on enemy territory:
Blazingly overconfident that I would somehow “figure something out.”
The Head Bureaucrat––I don’t remember her name or title––was shockingly unhelpful.
I’d missed all the deadlines (again, it was mostly the university’s fault) for aid and scholarships.
When I asked about some kind of teaching fellowship, I was informed that that was absolutely impossible.
The Head Bureaucrat insisted that I couldn’t even consider applying for those until I’d completed my first year in the program.
It was an utterly non-negotiable, ironclad rule.
Despite the relentless LA sunshine, in that moment things looked bleak.
In my first few days, I’d managed to make a new friend named Murdoch.
We discovered we shared a similar worldview, perhaps best embodied by the General Douglas MacArthur quote:
“Rules are Mostly Made to be Broken…”
Thus undaunted, Murdoch and I decided to stroll the campus and simply knock on doors in any academic department for which we were even remotely qualified to be hired.
Astonishingly, because of––or in spite of––our youthful hubris, we both succeeded.
I managed to charm a supremely cool English and Film Criticism professor who’d gotten his Ph.D. from Yale four years after I was born.
To my great good fortune, he needed a new teaching assistant for his latest course and to my delight, I was hired.
The course itself was a Southern California fantasy: Books and Films of the 50s and 60s.
I got to watch and read and then grade papers on works like Catch 22, On The Road, Rebel Without A Cause, and On The Waterfront.
That afternoon, I returned in triumph to visit the Head Bureaucrat, eager to inform her that despite her declaring it an impossibility, I had secured a full teaching fellowship.
My nemesis merely shrugged, stamped my bursar’s office forms, and turned her attention to her next victim, no doubt to quote other “carved in stones” rules.
Persistence is particularly on my mind since it’s the theme for our private RICH WITH PURPOSE group this month.
(We may open up the book club discussion to non-members in 2 weeks––please stay tuned.)
For now, though, I’m struck that far more than anything I learned about screenwriting technique (and I learned a lot), what I really took away from my graduate school moment was how often it pays to question authority.
Like Belle, sometimes it’s necessary to not take “No” for an answer and really dig your heels in.
Otherwise, you’re in danger of missing out on all the best parties.
Beyond this, there’s an added bonus in proving the Head Bureaucrats of the world wrong as you carve out your own path.
Indeed, as another Douglas MacArthur quote reminds us, ultimately: “You are remembered for the rules you break.”
Namaste for Now–––
P.S. If you want to hear some more stories of Rules I’ve Broken…
Next Saturday, March 20th, I’m doing a (free) live 30 minute interview hosted by an old friend for a program called Turn Your Passion Into Prosperity.
It’s at 12:50 pm EST (quirky time, right..)
You can sign up HERE.
