Although I’m currently working on a new book and associate producing a completed feature film, it may seem to casual readers that all I do is play Transformation (basically a board game best described as spiritualized Monopoly).
Well, last week I had my first go at Transformation since New Year’s Eve and it was … amazing.
What I wasn’t expecting –– although the instant it occurred it became beyond obvious –– was that the overwhelming answer to my question (you play with a question/focus), about moving forward in a frustrated career area was the resounding answer of… Forgiveness.
Every turn seemed to echo this theme in countless ways (and VERY loudly).
Let me back up a bit ….
Whenever I play Transformation, all sorts of amazing, against-all-odds coincidences occur and last week was no exception.
For example, last week, out of 100 cards, Adrian and I not only drew the exact same one for the final steps … he drew it twice. [I’m not great at math, but I actually think the odds of that happening are LITERALLY one in a million –– 1 x 100 x 100 x 100 = 1,000,000].
More than just sharpening my math skills, however, I learned something deep about how I’ve misunderstood forgiveness in my own life.
It’s easy to see how the concept of forgiveness applies to Big Things –– a relationship that ended badly and with tremendous betrayal, for example –– but I wasn’t expecting that to be the driving force behind my question.
Then I saw how it was a need to FORGIVE lots of lesser things –– a project not quite living up to my Vision for it, for example –– that was truly the obstacle in my way.
I guess I felt that Forgiveness was only necessary for situations that involved something operatically dramatic like Anger or Betrayal, Murder or Revenge … but wasn’t really needed for situations where a low-grade, simmering resentment or a lingering semi-bitter dissatisfaction prevailed.
And yet I quickly recalled one of George Leonard’s 28 LOA principles (#15):
TOLERATE NOTHING: When you put up with something, it costs you!
I realized that there’s a long list of smaller things that I haven’t forgiven, buried resentments that don’t keep me up at night but make me a little more sad when I think about them.
So I don’t think about them.
Except Transformation insisted I have to actually FORGIVE them in order to move forward.
I have to truly clear and truly let go of various bitternesses –– not really a word but you know what I mean: things swept under the rug and gathering dust under the bed.
Years ago, fresh out of college, I found myself in LA hired to drive a van of British Filmmakers on a tour for a week for some international networking organization.
This was way before GPS and thus I made the mistake of getting on the wrong part of San Vincente for a meeting with Roger Corman (the slasher film guy) and throwing the schedule off by at least 45 minutes. The very proper British woman who organized the tour was completely not thrilled.
But after 30 minutes of driving with her simmering rage as she road shotgun, I finally said to her, “Look, you’ve either got to Fire Me or Forgive Me –– you can’t have it both ways.”
She got quiet … and ultimately I got invited to the group’s final dinner at Orso, one table away from Barry Diller on a date with … (well, that’s another story).
Anyway, BEWARE FORGIVENESS COBWEBS: It’s time to Brace Yourself.
You’re going to be swept away during my January Spring Cleaning.
The Board Game Spoke … and I got the message.
